


Flumph Jam

by JadeTheThief



Category: Dice Funk Podcast D&D Campaign
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-17
Updated: 2019-05-17
Packaged: 2020-03-07 00:18:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18861895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadeTheThief/pseuds/JadeTheThief
Summary: Ever dealt with a horny flumph? Zoey did.





	Flumph Jam

Winifred stumbled into the Avant Garde HQ, tentacles pawing against the doorframe for stability even as he floated a couple feet off the ground. 

“Winnie?” Zoey asked, concerned. “What's wrong? You don't look so good.”

“I'm fiiiiine...” Winnie slurred a little as he pushed the door shut, turning back to the sorceress currently in the form of a purple-tailed mermaid with dragon wings. Wild Magic; don't question it. “I was just out running some errands when I ran into this elf, and...” He giggled, tentacles rubbing over his body dome. “Her viiiiibes, Zoey~! I've never met someone that horny before!”

“...What?” Zoey frowned in confusion. “Are you... high?”

“Maybe!” Winnie laughed, flailing his tentacles as he swept through the air, stopping to rummage through his closet of preserves. Scooping up a jar of strawberry and another of blueberry, he tipped them over his head and let them pour down on him, rubbing the juice into his skin with his free tentacles. “Ohhh, I'm such a dirty girl!”

Zoey burst into laughter, covering her face to hide the secondhand embarrassment. 

“Oh gods... fuck me, Zoey!” Winnie exclaimed, flopping onto his side and exposing a hole at the center of his tentacles. “I want to be your sexy slave!”

Zoey snickered, wiping a tear from her eye. “Um... what?”

“You have no idea how great I feel right now!” Winnie's mouth grinned, eyestalks twisting happily as he rubbed himself. “I want to be fucked soooo baaaad.”

“Uhh...” Zoey eased out of her chair, laying on her belly and inching uncertainly toward Winnie on her mermaid tail. “Look, I'd like to help you... as a friend, but... HOW do I do that?”

Winnie's tentacles rubbed around the hole. “S-stick something in there!”

Zoey squinted, frowning slightly as she stretched out a hand and poked Winnie's hole. The flumph gasped, tentacles straightening and growing erect as he moaned softly. 

“Eew it's wet and squishy in there...” Zoey grumbled, pulling her finger out and shaking it.

“Aww...” Winnie sighed. “Should I try to get Rolen to do it?”

Zoey paled, imagining a flumph-in-heat pawing at the overly-serious half elf. “I-I'll do it...” she stammered, staring down Winnie's fuck hole. Gritting her teeth, she closed her eyes and plunged her hand in.

“OhhhhhHHHH!” Winnie squealed, tentacles flailing happily. “Yes! Harder, Zoey!”

The sorceress cringed, wiggling her hand inside the flumph and biting her lip as some sort of sticky liquid oozed between her fingers. “Oh gawd, Winnie...”

The tentacles writhed as a soft, misty spray burst out of the hole. “Ohh...” Winnie moaned. “Thanks for that. I'll... I'll make you some extra good preserves.”

“T-that's okay...” Zoey shook her hand, glancing at it with slight disgust as she backed away. “I'm good, thanks.”

Winnie's eyestalks nodded and he levitated upright, floating upstairs for a nap. Meanwhile, the bell above the door rang as a nixie clad in a purple cape entered. “H-hi, Dora,” Zoey waved awkwardly with her slimy hand, then quickly dropped it and waved with the other one.

Dora leered, raising her nose and sniffing the air. “Did...” She looked around, seeing the jam on the floor. “Did you fuck Winnie without me!?”


End file.
